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Race horse loses rider but wins our hearts by racing without him

2023-04-15 01:12:59

Race horse loses rider but wins our hearts by racing without him

Race horse loses rider but wins our hearts by racing without him(图1)

They're calling him a dark horse, but we see nothing but a bright beacon of what perseverance in the face of adversity looks like.

At the Preakness Stakes show Saturday on Baltimore’s Pimlico Race Course, the take-no-sh*t horse named Bodexpress bucked off his rider before even leaving the gate. But he wasn't gonna let the split on the account of their creative differences keep him from doing what he does best: racing his goddamn heart out.

Embodying the #resistance movement, Bodexpress persisted, completing the entire race without his jockey.

His joyride of freedom might not have been within the rulebook of the Pimlico Race Course, but it was a victory for the spirit. Bodexpress became an internet sensation, even getting his own Twitter moment(Opens in a new tab).

Despite stealing the show, though, he was ultimately disqualified for not finishing the race (which is BS, if you ask us). Ironically, the much less strong-willed horse named War of Will took the prize home instead.

Race horse loses rider but wins our hearts by racing without him(图2)

Bodexpress' jockey, John Velazquez, was thankfully uninjured -- aside from the hurt to his pride.

"When the doors opened, I was off right from the start. He kind of jumped sideways," he told ESPN about their disastrous start. "I had my feet out of the irons, so I lost my balance then, I went off."

But honestly we get it. Maybe Bodexpress just got tired of only getting half the credit while doing most of the work. Maybe he's a symbol of the proletariat revolt that late stage capitalism needs. After all, it's the horse who's out there busting his ass winning races yet this guy gets all the fame and glory? Not in our America, buddy.

"He was just not behaving good in the gate. He was not sitting really well," said Velazquez, in a completely incorrect assessment of this very good boy horse's behavior.

We don't care if you didn't officially win, Bodexpress. You're a hero. And you don't let The Man tell you what races you can and can't participate in.

Race horse loses rider but wins our hearts by racing without him(图3)

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    "At the end of the day it's not going to cause any good for this case...The facts are this has damaged Chris Hansen's investigation," iNabber said in a video(Opens in a new tab) recapping the situation. "At the end of the day it was Chris who chose to work with these people, it was Chris who chose to use these methods. Maybe he used these methods before, but YouTube is a whole different thing to a television show."

    Whose story is this to tell?

    YouTubers, and consequently their viewers, voiced further skepticism about Hansen's intentions in covering the story when a Mel(Opens in a new tab) profile of the journalist reported that Investigation Discovery "bought the rights" to the Onision story. Mel later clarified that Hansen "signed a deal with Investigation Discovery to do a TV series on the Onision story," and Hansen tweeted that nobody is "selling rights to a story" in producing this documentary. But he hasn't divulged the details of his deal with Investigation Discovery, nor how much he's making from appearing in this series. The clarification added to the profile sparked a debate within the YouTube community about whose story this was to tell in the first place, and the ethical dilemma of raising awareness while profiting off the survivors' trauma.

    Following the laptop debacle and Nicotra's dismissal, several survivors who were interviewed for Have a Seat With Chris Hansen declined to be interviewed again for the documentary. One tweeted(Opens in a new tab) about feeling betrayed that Shiloh and Regina, another woman whose involvement with Onision and Avaroe allegedly began when she was a minor, agreed to appear in Onision: In Real Life. Another asked(Opens in a new tab) her Twitter followers to stop messaging her about Onision, as she was "trying to distance" herself from that part of her life.

    Because of the survivors' refusal to take part in the documentary, several commentary creators declined to partake as well, including Sulzbach. In a video posted in September 2020, Sulzbach voiced his support for the survivors and his concerns about Hansen's involvement in the project.

    "Several of the victims said they did not want their stories/trauma told on national TV and I was told their stories would be included regardless of their consent or not," Sulzbach said in an email to Mashable. "Also Chris Hansen isn't the person who he promised to be in delivering justice to the victims of Onision. Most of the victims have disassociated with Chris Hansen because they felt lied to, betrayed, and exploited."

    Chris Hansen faced backlash from the YouTube community following his Onision investigation. Credit: Discovery Channel

    Hansen, to his credit, does acknowledge that he's an outsider. In a Zoom call with Mashable, he described the backlash to the documentary as a "clash of cultures" between traditional and digital media. It's the survivors' "right," Hansen said, to not have to rehash their traumatic experiences by appearing in the documentary. But Hansen still believes that bringing the story, regardless of whether or not the survivors wanted it told, to a larger audience was "inevitable."

    "There's been no justice, so why not do this? Why not pursue it at the next level?"

    "There's been no justice, so why not do this? Why not pursue it at the next level?" Hansen said.

    He added that the allegations against Onision haven't been taken as seriously as they should have been over the last 10 years because they were dismissed as YouTube drama instead of potentially criminal abusive behavior. He also blamed YouTubers for keeping Onision relevant by continuing to take his bait and making more content about him, and pointed out that their criticism seems hollow, as many still post monetized videos about the Onision case.

    "Part of the reason that some are not taken seriously is because they engage in this drama channel culture where they will do anything and see anything and drag somebody's name to get clicks and clout," Hansen continued. "So by attacking the messenger, in this case, they can garner clicks and clout, which means money. So anyone who's being critical because [we're] generating some sort of profit from this project is guilty of it by doing what they're doing."

    Hansen and discovery+, however, do have the added backing and financial security of the television network behind them. YouTubers, for the most part, independently source, record, edit, and secure advertising. And if they're sued or face a copyright strike, they're on their own.

    Who gets credit?

    Although he's far from the first person to publicly condemn Onision as an alleged abuser, Onision: In Real Life paints Hansen as the whistleblower who brought the story to light. In the first episode, internet culture reporter Steven Asarch appears to credit "Chris Hansen's YouTube story" as the catalyst for the internet-wide push to deplatform Onision. In a tweet posted after the first episode's premiere, Asarch clarified that the comment was meant to be sarcastic and that he hoped later episodes would include his reservations about Hansen.

    Edwin Costa, a YouTuber who posts on the channel Edwins Generation, was the only commentary creator who actually appeared in the documentary. In a livestream(Opens in a new tab) responding to the backlash, Costa said he agreed to be interviewed because "if it was any other documentary" asking him to discuss a topic he's covered as extensively as the Onision story, he "wouldn't decline." He also explained that he amended his release so he wouldn't be included in any promotional materials, but leaked screeners exposed him to online criticism before he could explain his involvement on his "own terms." Costa added that he criticized Hansen during his interview, as well as expressed reservations about Shiloh, who was embroiled in her own controversy last year for being hostile toward Twitter users who questioned her and the other survivors. But like Asarch, Costa hasn't seen the third and final episode, which streams next week, and isn't sure whether any of his criticisms were included.

    Ultimately, Hansen's involvement in the documentary not only soured its reception in the YouTube community, but also kept key voices from being included. Onision: In Real LIfe at least blurs the faces of the survivors who declined to appear in the documentary, but it still includes clips of their appearances on Onision and Kai's channels, as well as clips of their interviews with Hansen. Though doing so is legally protected under fair use exceptions, many in the YouTube community find it morally reprehensible. The inclusion of those interviews and other clips by creators who declined to be interviewed added to the belief that Hansen, and by extension Investigative Discovery, valued the story over the survivors who were actually part of it.

    The series premiere backfired even more when its publicists sent screeners to commentary creators, nearly all of whom declined interviews, and asked them to publicly post their thoughts. Many were predictably critical. Some were offended that the series expected free promotion. For all their criticism of the documentary series and Shiloh's involvement in it, commentary creators affirmed that they still believed the survivors. Nobody conflated their disapproval of the series with siding with the alleged abuser in question. Onision, though, has been using the backlash against the series to discredit survivors and dismiss their allegations as "hashtag Me Too fake victims."

    "Discovery could have bypassed Chris Hansen entirely," YouTuber Jaclyn Glenn said in a recent video(Opens in a new tab) reacting to the documentary. She was interviewed for Have a Seat With Chris Hansen, but like many commentary creators, does not appear in Onision: In Real Life. "He's not an integral part of the story at all. He came in at the last second, basically hijacked it, and said it was his."

    At the end of the day, Onision: In Real Life will alert a more offline audience to not only Jackson's behavior, but also to the insidious nature of potential online predators. It's far from an ideal delivery, and its reputation will always be damaged by the controversy surrounding its production.

    That being said, this documentary will not be the end of the Onision saga. Jackson still has a monetizable online presence through YouTube and OnlyFans, and the reception to this documentary shouldn't overshadow the push for those platforms to take accountability for enabling him. Hansen told Mashable that any criminal investigation into Onision will likely take months more, especially as the COVID-19 pandemic derails normal procedures, but added that YouTube needs to ban him entirely.

    Shiloh said she doesn't agree with all aspects of "cancel culture," but acknowledged that it exists for a reason. To protect vulnerable children from ever experiencing what she went through, she added, the onus should be on YouTube itself to hold its creators accountable when their users raise concerns. Until then, she'll keep sharing her story regardless of the delivery or platform.

    "I used to just scream it out into the internetverse, as I used to say, but as soon as I started realizing that I didn't really owe anybody an explanation, I can genuinely say that I don't really feel pressured to talk about it," Shiloh concluded. "It's mostly now just something that I live with, and something that's part of my healing [is] talking about it. I'm definitely not going to go quiet about it anytime soon."

    UPDATE: Jan. 15, 2021, 10:50 a.m. PST Onision responded via Twitter DM to dispute allegations of predatory behavior and abuse, and sent links to blog posts on his own website as evidence.

    Onision has denied interviews in past coverage, and has instead responded to requests for comment with links to his blog posts and paid platforms.

  • Where to buy sex toys online (including Target and Sephora)

    Where to buy sex toys online (including Target and Sephora)

    Whether you're looking for your very first vibrator or have lost count of how many sex toys you have in your collection, the internet can be a pretty great place to find your next toy.


    Of course, the insane amount of options that make finding that just-right sex toy possible can also make the process more overwhelming than you'd wish, especially for a product that's supposed to deliver big on pleasure.

    SEE ALSO: Best sex toys for women: Take pleasure into your own hands

    So where does one begin? The first step is to make sure you're going to retailers that make quality products. Sex toys get a lot less fun when they're not made out of materials that are okay to go on or in your genitals. To best guarantee this, we highly recommend shopping directly from trusted names in the sex toy business or from the manufacturers themselves, both of which you'll find on this list.

    And while a dose of healthy skepticism at any suspiciously low prices is always good (again we cannot express enough how important quality is for your safety), that doesn't mean that you'll have to break the bank to boost the thrills in your bedroom.

    So go forth, and take your first digital steps into your next sex toy journey with these 17 online shops. If you need any more guidance making your selections, we have a handy guide, along with a few recommendations below for each shop.

    1. Lovehoney(Opens in a new tab)

    If it’s sex toys you’re looking for, the XBIZ Award winner for “International Pleasure Products Company of the Year” is a good place to start. Lovehoney can sell you toys, sure, but you can also find a podcast on their site that answers customer questions and delivers expert advice, sex tips, and even little-known facts about sex! Lovehoney is clearly committed to sexual health and wellness, making their online shopping experience easy and comfortable.

    Some current best sellers include the Magic Wand Plus Extra-Powerful Plug-In Vibrator(Opens in a new tab), a Womanizer x We-Vibe limited edition set, and the Njoy Pure Wand(Opens in a new tab).

    Credit: Njoy
    Credit: Magic Wand

    2. Babeland(Opens in a new tab)

    Don't be fooled by the name, this one's not just for the babes out there. Before you've really narrowed down your search, Babeland is a great first stop for seeing a finely curated inventory of sex toys, from top brands like Womanizer(Opens in a new tab), Satisfyer(Opens in a new tab), and Njoy(Opens in a new tab). So whether you're looking for that all-time classic Hitachi wand(Opens in a new tab), a new Tenga Spinner masturbation sleeve(Opens in a new tab) (aka one of our favorite budget toys for penises), or just starting to browse, this site has got you covered, without giving you so many options that your search becomes overwhelming.

    In addition to providing an impressive stock of vibrators, suction toys, dildos, couples toys, BDSM supplies, and most other popular sex toys that are out on the market, Babeland also hosts free online education events(Opens in a new tab) so you have the supplies and the know-how to really explore your sexuality.

    We give Tenga a ten(ga) for providing unique sensations. Credit: Tenga

    3. PinkCherry(Opens in a new tab)

    Like Lovehoney, PinkCherry promotes a sex-positive atmosphere with blog posts(Opens in a new tab) about sexual wellness and satisfaction, like “Vibrators For Men: Pleasure on the Rise(Opens in a new tab)” and “How to Clean a Dildo for Safe Personal Pleasure(Opens in a new tab).” Oh, and they also sell sex toys. Go figure!

    PinkCherry offers a wide assortment of adult pleasure items and sexual wellness tools for various tastes and comfort levels. You’ll find all the usual stuff like vibrators(Opens in a new tab) and lubricants(Opens in a new tab), along with bondage tools and attire(Opens in a new tab) and autostrokers(Opens in a new tab). You can also find current deals(Opens in a new tab) on site products like the Satisfyer Pro 2(Opens in a new tab) and the Bodywand Midnight Massager(Opens in a new tab).

    4. Adam & Eve(Opens in a new tab)

    Some of you may be Adam & Eve regulars and some of you only know them because you stayed up too late watching TV and saw an ad. Either way, chances are high you can find the sex toy you’re looking for from the adult toy store that turned 50 this year. They do say sex only gets better with age.

    Some best sellers include Eve’s Rechargeable Thrusting Rabbit(Opens in a new tab) and the Big O Multi-Stage Vibrating Penis Ring(Opens in a new tab).

    The site also includes sections for gay (AdamMale(Opens in a new tab)) and lesbian (Eve’s Toys(Opens in a new tab)) shoppers.

    Eve's thrusting rabbit allows you to sit back and relax. Credit: Adam and Eve

    5. Eve’s Toys(Opens in a new tab)

    The Adam & Eve sub-site with toys and other pleasure products designed for lesbians offers vibrators(Opens in a new tab), kink toys(Opens in a new tab), strap-ons(Opens in a new tab) and many more. The Double Delight Strap-On(Opens in a new tab) is a current best seller and allows the wearer to “feel it thrust into you while you do some thrusting of your own!”

    Double down on delight with this strap-on. Credit: Pipedream

    6. AdamMale(Opens in a new tab)

    The other sub-site of Adam & Eve, with toys and other adult products geared toward gay men, has dildos(Opens in a new tab), masturbators(Opens in a new tab), cock rings, anal douches... the whole nine inche – yards. Yards.

    Right, back to cocks and stuff. More specifically, Adam’s True Feel Cock(Opens in a new tab), a best seller listed at $44.95 that's currently on sale for $22.48. The Satisfyer Men Beads(Opens in a new tab) are also flying off the virtual shelves and into bedrooms.

    7. Unbound(Opens in a new tab)

    Looking for an aesthetically pleasing sex toy brand that's affordable and actually delivers? Yes, it's real, and it's Unbound. This women-run brands boasts a solid selection from toys, from a compact vibe(Opens in a new tab) we're personally big fans of, as well as other finds like their best-selling suction toy(Opens in a new tab), flexible vibrator(Opens in a new tab), and beginner-friendly butt plug(Opens in a new tab).

    Credit: Unbound
    Credit: Unbound

    8. Lelo(Opens in a new tab)

    Say you're feeling pretty happy with your base collection of sex toys and are now on the hunt for something a little more luxury — look no further than Lelo. The brand sells sex toys with an extra something, like a rabbit vibrator(Opens in a new tab) that replicates the "come hither" motion inside of you (and actually works) and a clit suction stimulator(Opens in a new tab) that proves to be a bit of a tease, in the best way possible. As it is a higher-end brand, be prepared to shell out a bit more — many of their best sellers(Opens in a new tab) are $150 and up.

    9. Dame(Opens in a new tab)

    For a manufacturer that sits between Unbound and Lelo in terms of price range but brings some innovative and impressive products to the table, you'll definitely want to check out Dame. From a hands-free vibrator(Opens in a new tab) to an intercourse game-changer(Opens in a new tab), Dame has made plenty of products(Opens in a new tab) worth raving about, and oh, have we(Opens in a new tab) raved(Opens in a new tab). Dame's sex toys feel good, look good, and if for whatever reason you don't find them to be absolutely satisfying, you can return them within 60 days for store credit, which is (unfortunately) not too common for most sex toy retailers.

    Credit: Dame
    Credit: Dame

    10. Maude(Opens in a new tab)

    If you're not really a fan of the traditional gendered marketing around sex toys, meet Maude. The brand — whose name reflects its mission to redefine modern intimacy — doesn't categorize its sex toys as being for "men" and "women". In fact, it doesn't call its vibrators and butt plugs sex toys at all, opting instead to call them devices. While their approach feels like a breath of fresh air, even better are their prices — their standard Vibe(Opens in a new tab) is one of our favorite budget picks, and the Drop makes for a great (and gorgeous) addition to any vibrator collection.

    The Maude Drop is actually a work of art. Credit: Maude

    11. Sephora(Opens in a new tab)

    If you're intrigued by Dame and Maude's products but wouldn't mind earning some Beauty Insider points with your purchase, Sephora's intimate care(Opens in a new tab) section has got you covered. The beauty retailer started selling sex toys in February 2022, offering a new place to pick up some of the best vibes from both brands, from Dame's Pom(Opens in a new tab) to the Maude Vibe(Opens in a new tab). Although you won't find the products in stores (at least, not yet), it's still plenty convenient to pick up setting powder and a sex toy in the same online shopping trip.

    12. Sunset Novelties(Opens in a new tab)

    Sunset Novelties stores may only be located in the Southeastern U.S., but that doesn’t mean they can’t ship to you. So if you’re in the market for a new vibrator(Opens in a new tab), butt plug(Opens in a new tab), sex enhancer(Opens in a new tab), or even a stripper pole(Opens in a new tab)(!!!), you don’t have to be a Southerner to get your hands on one. Maybe even pair that new pole with an exotic dancer ensemble(Opens in a new tab) in whatever style you’re looking for.

    New year, new fitness resolutions, amiright? Credit: sunset novelties

    13. Wet For Her(Opens in a new tab)

    Wet For Her is an adult toy store that was founded in Paris, France, in 2009, designed for lesbians and the queer community. “Owner and CEO Alice Derock was disappointed to discover that the sex toy industry was limited when it came to non-phallic sex toys for the lesbian and queer community... It was this that inspired Alice to create products specifically for lesbians and queer women,” their site reads. Eight different styles of dildos, harnesses, finger extenders(Opens in a new tab), the best-selling scissoring vibrator(Opens in a new tab), and of course, much more. Not to be forgotten is a line of “gender-affirming trans-masculine products(Opens in a new tab),”(Opens in a new tab) like binders, packers, and a Trans Masc Pump(Opens in a new tab).

    "RockHer" with that mini scissoring vibrator. Credit: wet for her

    14. The Kink Store(Opens in a new tab)

    It’s exactly what it sounds like. The Kink Store is a destination for sex toys, attire, and equipment for those looking to explore their sexual kinks. You'll find toys for chastity(Opens in a new tab), BDSM(Opens in a new tab), electro-sex(Opens in a new tab), impact play(Opens in a new tab), and a number of other kinks. The electro-sex-handy TAZapper(Opens in a new tab), which delivers “a non-penetrating static spark of electricity,” is a staff favorite and best seller. It also kind of looks like a sexual lightsaber, which we think is pretty neat.

    According to its description, the TAZapper is "perfect for intimidation!" Credit: TAZapper

    15. BoyZshop(Opens in a new tab)

    This one’s for da boyz. BoyZshop’s collection of gay sex toys and products spans multiple tastes and experience levels. You'll find penetrative toys and non-penetrative toys. Kink gear(Opens in a new tab). Sex machines(Opens in a new tab). Lube. Prep products(Opens in a new tab) like enemas. Whether you’re just looking for a standard dildo or if you’re exploring urethral play(Opens in a new tab), BoyZshop offers options for both ... and a heck of a lot in between.

    16. Target(Opens in a new tab)

    Yes, Target sells everything, including sex toys. So next time you’re out to grab some game day snacks and paper plates, go ahead and pick up a plusOne Rechargeable Dual Vibrating Massager(Opens in a new tab) or the Lelo Sona 2 Cruise(Opens in a new tab) while you’re at it. This is what a “Target run” looks like in 2021, and we’re not upset about it.

    Get all of your essentials at Target — including luxury sex toys like the Lelo Sona Cruise 2. Credit: Lelo

    17. Amazon(Opens in a new tab)

    You buy everything else from Amazon, so why not sex toys? You can find just about any toy you’re looking for, from a variety of pleasure product brands from Lynx to Shibari. Plus, that Prime shipping means you won't have to wait long to try out your new finds. The main drawback from purchasing from third-party stores like Amazon is that you do run a higher risk of buying toys that aren't authentic or made from the right materials, so before clicking add to cart, make sure you're doing your research before hitting "Add to Cart."

    Best sellers(Opens in a new tab) range from vibrators to lube to lingerie. More specifically, you'll find favorites like the Fleshlight Quickshot Vantage(Opens in a new tab) and plusOne bullet vibrator(Opens in a new tab).

    Related Video: The best sex toys to buy during quarantine

  • The 12 worst types of Instagram Stories

    The 12 worst types of Instagram Stories


    We need to talk about Instagram Stories.

    "Story of my life"? More like please don’t story your whole life, or at least do so tastefully.

    Over the past few years, Instagram Stories have cannibalized Snapchat and emerged supreme as the premiere location to show off shaky cam concert footage and puppy-dog selfies. But with great power comes great misuse of a platform.

    We’ve all succumb to the desire to constantly cherry pick the juiciest parts of our life and share them with anyone who cares to tune in. Sometimes, though, those juicy bits don’t taste, sound, or look very good to those of us consuming them.

    It’s time for a crash course in Instaquette (Instagram etiquette, duh).

    12. The 'New Post' Story

    Don’t post your post to your story to your post to your story to your post…

    If you post something, we’ll see it in due time.

    Just like Bebe Rexha said in her hit song with that country singer: "If it’s meant to be, it’ll be." If we’re meant to see your post, we will. You mustn’t shove it down our throats by posting it on your story with a GIF or scribbles over it, concealing the very thing we just might have been interested in seeing. That’s called overkill, friends.

    I wouldn’t have minded scrolling by and throwing you a like, organically. But now that I know you want me to see something, I will actively avoid looking at it, Birdbox style.

    11. The Work Out Photos Story

    We get it, you like to get your iPhone sweaty.

    It’s 2019. We’re all for body positivity and going after your goals in a healthy way. Strive! A nice, strong gym post is cool. But to constantly barrage us with poorly lit semi-self conscious pics of you flexing is poor form. Leave it to Kim Kardashian. Do your squats and your pull ups and then barrage us with pics in those jeans that are beginning to fit like a second skin. Double negative if you’re forcing your significant other to participate in your sweaty social gains. They just want to meet their PR without feeling pressured to appear swol to your 539 followers.

    10. The Filmed Without Consent Story

    Let your friends do their thing without turning it into a production.

    If your friend wants to be filmed, we guarantee they will do something to warrant a recording sesh. It’s just not cool to constantly be filming your friends’ every move. Soon, they’ll start to feel like they can’t do anything around you without feeling like Britney circa 2006.

    There’s nothing more cringe-worthy than watching someone publicly squirm under the lens of their friend's iPhone.

    9. The Pointless Poll Story

    They see me pollin’, they hatin’.


    Bad Instagram Stories faux pas #2871840 Credit:

    If you’re going to put a poll in your story, and yes there is a right and wrong time for a poll. Please adhere to poll etiquette.

    For the love of all that is good, place your poll in the center of the screen so we don’t accidentally vote if we’re trying to move on to the next slide. OR conversely when we are aggressively trying to vote on your poll and you’ve placed it so far to the left that we end up clicking backwards. We don’t need to see your story twice.

    Finally, the polls that read "yes" or "yes, but in red" need to die. It was never funny.

    8. The Terrible Music Story

    If you play a song through your speakers, you’re dead to us.

    Instagram went out of their way for you, and you have shown no gratitude. We’re looking at you Kylie Jenner. That’s right, we’re talking about playing songs through your phone’s speakers instead of the music feature on the app. We would have listened to AM radio if we wanted our music reception to go in and out, so we sure as hell don’t want it coming from your iPhone.

    7. The Facetune'd Child Story

    We don’t want to see your baby smoother than a glazed doughnut, Rebecca.

    If we’ve said it once, we’ve said it a thousand times. DON’T FACETUNE YOUR CHILDREN. Babies are naturally cute. There is no need to morph or transform their bodies, thus holding them to ridiculous beauty/cuteness standards, before they even know what ridiculous beauty standards are. We really thought this one should be an obvious don’t, but as per usual the internet has found a way to disappoint us.

    6. The Never-ending Rant Story

    Go 👏 off 👏 but 👏 respect 👏 the 👏 medium

    Listen, sometimes you just gotta go TF off — whether that be about a topic of social injustice, or when you feel personally attacked by the vicious moms who fought you for dominance at the Bath and Body Works Candle Day Sale™.

    Unfortunately, the time limit of Story clips don’t necessarily lend themselves to a 30 minute impassioned critique of the cisheteropatriarchy. And we guarantee that people would love to hear it — if only you weren’t getting cut off every 15 seconds. Next time a particular issue lights a fire within you, spark it up on YouTube instead.

    5. The BFF Birthday Story

    It’s my party, and I’ll post 9,000,000 clips if I want to.

    🎵 Happy Birthday dear [yourfriendthatidon’tknow], Happy Birthday to you! 🎵 It’s literally Birthday Law that you must spend the day hyping up your bestie on their birthday — but do we really care? Yes, we’re sure your friend’s #bdayLook is bomb. Yes, that party looks like it’s jumping. Yes, that cake looks delish. But are we there? No. BFF birthday stories are the epitome of JOMO (Joy Of Missing Out) — watching people you don’t know have fun is boring, not glamorous.

    4. The Boomerang Clipshow Story

    Nothing but Boomerangs for days.

    When the Boomerang first came to Instagram, having your own personal GIF machine was a fun, inventive way to liven up your feed. Now that the novelty has worn off, though, we’re begging you to stop. There’s so many more features available to you on Stories now: face filters, zooming in with music, uhh….other things! We don’t need a whiplash-inducing video of you chugging your third cocktail of the night.

    3. The Tons of Unreadable Text Story



    You don’t need a degree in Color Theory to slap some aesthetically pleasing text onto your Story, but at the very least please try and make it readable. There’s nothing worse than attempting to speed-read 0.2 size cursive neon green font on a bright yellow border in less than 15 seconds before the Story switches. Crowding the screen with text also takes away from the actual photo itself, if you took one. This is not a comic book, so don’t fill your stories up with speech bubbles.

    2. The Filming Your Drive Story

    Yes, a video of the street you’re driving down is EXACTLY the content I was looking for.

    Everyone knows you shouldn’t text and drive, or at least that’s what we thought. That includes Instagram, guys. Not only is it dangerous and could cause bodily harm to you or others, but we can guarantee that absolutely no one cares about you filming yourself talking or blasting the bass through your crappy car speakers.

    No one asked for this content, in fact, we’re asking that it stop.

    1. The Concert Story

    If we wanted to see that concert, we would’ve bought a ticket.

    We’re so glad you went to that concert. We really are. Live your joy. But watching said concert playback on a 5-inch glass screen with sound quality that makes it seem like it was recorded on a Nintendo DS was never part of our plan.

    Unless you’re literally backstage with the artist, please refrain from recording back-to-back snippets of their concert. Your seats aren’t even that good so we can’t differentiate the artist from their backup dancers. This also applies to Storying in a loud club. Unless Jaden Smith is holding a sparkler while simultaneously pouring you a shot of Grey Goose, refrain. We will not have the FOMO you’re so desperately trying to induce if our ears are bleeding. If you must post, kill the sound.

    You can be better at Instagram Stories. We believe in you. Credit: GIPHY

    The truth is that every Instagram story can easily be swiped away at a moment’s notice. You can speedrun through clips faster than your finger can graze glass (literally). None of these annoying stories will kill us, although we may claim they will — after all, we live for the drama.

    But, like most people, we are genuinely interested in our friends’ lives. Just maybe not enough to put up with their Insta habits. As I’m sure legions of people throughout history would agree, some stories just aren’t meant to be told.

  • Apples new credit card gets compared to Billy McFarlands credit card scam

    Apples new credit card gets compared to Billy McFarlands credit card scam


    Someone didn't watch the Fyre Festival documentaries.

    Apple announced its groundbreaking new pay feature during its event on Monday: A titanium credit card with no card number, no signature, no CVV, and no expiration date. All of the vital information would be stored in the Wallet app, so it's less of a credit card and more of a physical way to pay through the app.

    As wonderful as it seems, Twitter users couldn't help but compare it to Magnises, the credit card/social club scam that Fyre Fest grifter Billy McFarland came up with before the disastrous music festival.

    Like Apple Card, Magnises' appeal was that the card was metal, not just plastic. Apple's new card will apparently be made of titanium.


    And of course, the whole cool factor.

    SEE ALSO: What you should know about Billy McFarland's pre-Fyre Fest scam Magnises

    If Tim Cook promises Bahamian bungalows and beachfront sets, it's probably time to run.

    UPDATE: March 25, 2019, 1:34 p.m. PDT Corrected "Apple Pay app" to "Wallet app."


  • This supercut of Star Trek star Jonathan Frakes asking questions has gone gloriously viral

    This supercut of Star Trek star Jonathan Frakes asking questions has gone gloriously viral


    In the world of Twitter, pretty much anything can go viral.

    It doesn't necessarily have to be incredibly shocking, or funny, or uplifting. Sometimes it's the most random things that do the best.

    SEE ALSO: Cool English teacher asked her students to make memes. They delivered.

    Here to illustrate that point is Twitter user Zane Golia(Opens in a new tab)'s supercut of Star Trek star Jonathan Frakes asking rhetorical questions.


    Those clips are taken from Frakes' late '90s series Beyond Belief: Fact or Fiction -- an exploration of the supernatural which has gained something of a cult following.

    As the following YouTube video with a cool half million views suggests, it's also very popular supercut material.

    Keep 'em coming.


  • New York commuter prefers the company of a goblin wearing the same outfit as him


    New York commuter prefers the company of a goblin wearing the same outfit as him

    New York has truly seen it all.

    This week on the subway, @bootyslime(opens in a new tab) observed a man sit down and casually take a goblin out of his bag wearing the same outfit as him. He then proceeded to put the thing on his lap like a child.

    This strange scene was corroborated by another watchful New Yorker who took video of this odd pair.

    After further research, the internet learned that this goblin is actually a "werepup(opens in a new tab)," or a very realistic looking "werewolf baby." Alright, sure. But why get dressed in matching outfits?

    Once you visit the website, they're a lot to take in.

    And also frightening.

    Well, you learn something new everyday. At least the subway man's werepup was nicely dressed and lived in an expensive Nike bag? Nothing but the best for his werepup?

    Either way, it certainly makes riding the subway a lot more interesting.

  • 2 activists have won the Nobel Peace Prize for their work to end sexual violence

    2 activists have won the Nobel Peace Prize for their work to end sexual violence


    Activists Nadia Murad and Denis Mukwege, who are working to end rape and sexual violence as weapons of war, were just awarded the 2018 Nobel Peace Prize.

    SEE ALSO: A woman has just won the Nobel Prize in Physics for the first time in 55 years

    The two have both worked for years as activists, drawing attention to the widespread use of rape and sexual violence in wars across the globe. According(opens in a new tab) to Unicef, systematic rape as a weapon of war is linked to ethnic cleansing.

    Iraqi activist Nadia Murad is a survivor of rape and sexual slavery herself. Murad, who is a part of the religious minority of the Yazidi, was captured and enslaved by the terrorist organisation ISIS. Among other things, Murad has previously campaigned with Amal Clooney for justice for Yazidi women and girls who were subjected to rape and human trafficking by ISIS.


    Denis Mukwege is a gynaecologist working in the war torn Democratic Republic of Congo (DR Congo). Mukwege has treated thousands of women and girls affected by rape and sexual violence in DR Congo. According(opens in a new tab) to a report from this year by Thompson Reuters, DR Congo is the second most dangerous country in the world for women in terms of sexual violence (India is number one).

    The two were celebrated for their "crucial contribution to focusing attention on, and combating, such war crimes," the Nobel committee writes(opens in a new tab) in a statement.

    "A more peaceful world can only be achieved if women and their fundamental rights and security are recognised and protected in war," the committee concluded.

  • New study finds female-led films perform better at box office. Your move, Hollywood.

    New study finds female-led films perform better at box office. Your move, Hollywood.


    Movie audiences love women.

    According to a study by Creative Arts Agency and shift7(opens in a new tab), films with women in leading roles earn more than their male counterparts at the box office, a finding which should lead to a major paradigm shift in show business.

    “The perception that it’s not good business to have female leads is not true,” CAA agent Christy Haubegger told The New York Times(opens in a new tab). “They’re a marketing asset.”

    SEE ALSO: We have a lot to learn from Megan Fox's #MeToo comments

    CAA and shift7 examined 350 top box office films from 2014 to 2017, defining "lead actor" as the first performer credited in official press materials (also of note: most of these films passed the Bechdel test). 105 of these were women. In every category broken down by budget, films with women in the lead outperformed those starring men.


    Credit: shift7

    Haubegger attributed this to the movie audience's desire to see something new, rather than say, yet another superhero origin story about a white guy. That's why stories about women perform better, as well as stories starring people of color(opens in a new tab) (the subject of a previous study).

    The study was part of an active effort by CAA to diversify Hollywood with regard to women and people of color. But even in light of new research, Haubegger notes that change may be distant.

    “A lot of times in our business there is a lot of bias disguising itself as knowledge,” Haubegger said. Translation: Finding could still be touch for women and minorities simply because those in power won't act.


    But hopefully, with a study like this gaining traction and the obvious incentives of performance and revenue, Hollywood uses this momentum to improve.